E75 Meeting Brits Isn't Always Easy (feat. Spanish with Antonio)

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[00:00:00.190] - Oliver (Host)

Antonio, how are you?

[00:00:03.390] - Antonio (Guest)

Oliver, I'm fine. Thank you. I'm very happy to be here. Thanks for having me.

[00:00:08.870] - Oliver (Host)

Okay, good. Well, I mean, you kind of have to say that, don't you? Like, you know, it's—

[00:00:12.950] - Antonio (Guest)

I had to say so. Yeah.

[00:00:15.450] - Oliver (Host)

Do you genuinely feel happy or do you feel nervous? This is your first ever, ever podcast episode in English.

[00:00:21.440] - Antonio (Guest)

That's true. That's true. I will be more personal now. Okay. So yeah, I'm very nervous. I am a bit nervous, to be honest, because yes, as you said, it is my first ever episode in English, full episode. So yeah, but I'm comfortable with you. So, so far it's fine. (I'm glad.) If I start to flush or anything, you can tell me and we can pause, whatever.

[00:00:49.610] - Oliver (Host)

Well, I mean, we've just finished doing an episode for your Spanish language podcast, so Spanish with Antonio, for anybody who is learning Spanish, then they can go and see. And for me, I suppose that this is actually not that different an experience from my ordinary experience for English and Beyond, because ultimately I am talking to a Spanish person with an advanced level of English who has lived in the UK. So it's really just kind of like slotting one Spaniard in for another. So not that different. You've, you mentioned before that you've lived in the UK. Let's hear about that in a second. But before then, welcome to English and Beyond, the advanced version of the podcast. As always, transcript, vocabulary flashcards, vocabulary learning games available on our website, morethanlanguage.com. Where, tell us a little bit about that. Where did you live? How long was it for? What was your experience?

[00:01:42.940] - Antonio (Guest)

Okay. So yeah, I did live in England. It was in Portsmouth. Specifically in the southern part of England. And I did my Erasmus year there. Why Portsmouth? I honestly don't know. It was basically because the university gave many opportunities as to the subjects I could choose, etc. And so I knew a girl as well who did her Erasmus year there and she recommended it to me. So I decided to give it a go and I actually, I'm not, like, I don't regret it at all. It was a very nice experience. I lived there for a whole academic year, so 9, 10 months, more or less. And yeah, it was a very good experience overall. The city didn't have anything special because every single time that someone, well, that I tell someone that I was in Portsmouth and that person is British.

[00:02:58.810] - Oliver (Host)

A British person.

[00:02:59.680] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, a British person or an English person.

[00:03:02.820] - Oliver (Host)

I guess they probably say to you, why Portsmouth?

[00:03:04.410] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, I always get the same question which is, why Portsmouth specifically?

[00:03:11.160] - Oliver (Host)

But I, do you know, so from one perspective, I agree with you in the sense that I have been to Portsmouth, but I don't really remember very much about it. And I think that's probably good and bad because if you remember a place, that's not necessarily for the best reasons. (That's true.) I'm sure Portsmouth will have a lot of benefits to it, but I guess that one of the benefits for you would, I imagine, I don't know, but I imagine there were fewer Spanish people in Portsmouth than there would have been if you'd gone to London or Manchester.

[00:03:40.550] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, that's true. The size was a very important factor for me. I didn't want to go to London or Manchester or any, like Birmingham, for example, because I knew that big cities could make certain aspects of life harder. And normally when you are in a small, smaller city, it's easier to get to know people. As you said, to find yourself really immersed in the British culture, even though I must admit, I didn't make many British friends that year, I guess because I was in my Erasmus year, so I got to know way more Erasmus students from all over the world. So I did have many British classmates and they were super nice, but I don't know why I didn't make many friends there.

[00:04:38.670] - Oliver (Host)

I mean, it's— I know a lot of Spanish people, obviously, and now that I live in Spain, and even before then, because it was something that lots of Spanish people would say to me, because when I was learning Spanish, I was learning it in London. And so I would always look for language exchanges or tandems, you know, conversation partners, basically. And frequently they would say to me that I was the only British person that they knew. And so I don't think it's an uncommon thing, but I think that it's true whenever you live abroad, right? That I think it's often quite hard to meet people. It was definitely my experience in Italy that I knew almost no one in my whole time there. And Italians are famous for being quite friendly, no? And I still managed— like, it's not the British people, like, we don't have the fame for being like the most outgoing, friendliest people, except when we're drunk. And so, (True!) yeah, I am. Yeah, uh, actually, I, I did, um, an episode of this podcast about friend— I can't remember the actual— it may have been about friendship as well. It was about drinking, actually, about the fact that so many people I know from Europe and Spain would say that they'd go out on a night out, that they would meet some people, some British people, that they were drunk, that they would be convinced they were going to be best friends forever.

[00:05:56.080] - Oliver (Host)

Was that your experience of Portsmouth as well?

[00:05:58.360] - Antonio (Guest)

Sort of. Not exactly. Like, I don't want to say that you are, yeah, (Alcoholics?) Drunk people only. Yeah. Alcoholics. No, no. But it's true that you are not that outgoing. Or if you are in certain occasions, after all, I didn't feel that welcomed, you know. Um, not welcomed, maybe that's not the word, but, um, definitely I wouldn't be invited to so many parties with only Brits, you know. Oh, um, and I didn't experience that, for example, in, in France or Italy where I lived as well.

[00:06:45.910] - Oliver (Host)

Uh, so I was just about to say to you that, like, you know, I know that this is probably a dangerous ground for you, Antonio, because your audience will be mostly British, and I was just about to ask you to compare explicitly French and British hospitality.

[00:06:58.490] - Antonio (Guest)

Well, you know what? Somehow I think it's normal because I'll tell you this. Okay, so my experience was they were super nice in class, like super nice, very helpful when it came to the English language, when it came to everything, honestly. And so nice, like obviously nice, they were British and polite, but (Trying to pull it back now!) - no, no, no, no, no. But it's true that I was expecting something more sometimes. Like, as you said, they could be your best friends at a party, but then I wouldn't get invited to the next party or their house party, or they would be super nice in class, but then they wouldn't make the next step, you know, forward towards a friendship. And I was sort of expecting that from them also because, you know, when you are in a foreign country, you don't speak the language, you don't feel, you know, you don't know the cultural codes sometimes. And so you sort of wait for the other person to make the first step forward. (And they just didn't?) No, they did sometimes, but it didn't work that well. Maybe it's also because of me, but I was— I was— before, I was— I wanted to say as well that it's normal somehow, because if I analyse myself and my attitude towards Erasmus students sometimes, or foreign students who took who do, sorry, who do just one year abroad.

[00:08:48.620] - Antonio (Guest)

Sometimes I don't want to make friends with those people. Yeah. Because I know they are going to leave at some point, you know? So it feels like a huge investment in time for someone that's going to leave and you know that, which is so, so cruel to say because I've been there. I've been in their shoes as well, like I'm saying now. And there must be someone who invites them over to their houses, who is more welcoming to them. And I haven't been that person, you know, and I've needed that person abroad, so...

[00:09:31.780] - Oliver (Host)

Yeah, maybe, maybe now after doing this episode, next time you meet someone who says to you, oh, I'm in, I'm I'm in Malaga for 1 year, you'll be like, right, we've got a year to kind of make a friendship forever, you know? Yeah, to be that person.

[00:09:47.050] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah. And it's a shame because I know it may turn into your best friend, you know, that person may turn into your best friend.

[00:09:55.590] - Oliver (Host)

It's difficult because, I mean, I totally know what you're talking about and I've been on both sides of that. Um, and in fact, I would say that I probably have been very open-minded about being friends with people that are there temporarily, or trying to make lots of friends when I'm abroad, when I'm living abroad, even though I know I'm not going to be there forever. But the difficulty with that is you do end up with lots of friendships with people all over the world. (Yeah.) You know, and if you just are thinking, oh, I've got a couple of hours, I just want to go for lunch, clearly that doesn't happen. Instead, you're planning trips, 6 months, 1 year in advance so that you can see each other. So the internet obviously has made it easier to maintain these friendships, but at the same time, it's not the same. No, you do need friends in the local area, and it is nice to, you know, I have friends that I've had from university, from school, and that is really nice to have. There is something special about that. But it is also nice, I think, to have, um, you know, to meet new people in your 30s.

[00:10:58.830] - Oliver (Host)

Well, as I mentioned earlier, I do want to hear a direct comparison between France and the UK. So let's move to the topic of France, one of my favourite topics on this podcast.

[00:11:11.480] - Antonio (Guest)

Of France? Okay.

[00:11:13.340] - Oliver (Host)

Well, I think it's important for me occasionally— it is a British culture podcast, you know, and it's important for me occasionally to insult the French. Do you imply how— I know, I know we're going to come out badly here, so the French listeners will be pleased. But tell us about France. Tell us about your experience living in French— France, because I know that your French is very, very good as well. Have you got a C2 in French?

[00:11:38.010] - Antonio (Guest)

Um, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:11:41.600] - Oliver (Host)

So C2, for anyone that doesn't know, is the highest level that you can get in the European classification of languages. So tell us about France.

[00:11:49.340] - Antonio (Guest)

Well, first I need to tell some— tell you something, which is that you bumped into probably the most, the, how to put it, like the biggest "defensor". Is that a word?

[00:12:05.460] - Oliver (Host)

Defender.

[00:12:06.420] - Antonio (Guest)

Defender. Thank you. Defender of the French culture, language, and country in the world. Um, especially because...

[00:12:17.070] - Oliver (Host)

Observant listeners and viewers of the video will see my soul starts to leave my eyes as you carry on with this. So tell us, what makes France so good?

[00:12:27.890] - Antonio (Guest)

Everyone hates France and I don't know why. Like, yeah, I am fully aware of the historic reasons that may lead to that. But today I would say that, yeah, France is a great country and of course I'm not totally, like, I'm biased for sure because France, ever since I can recall, is one of my favourite places, and French is my favourite language by far. I'm sorry to say this. I love the English language as well, but I know there's something about the French language. If you can see all this (these) series of books, they are all in French. I also love to read in French. And my experience there, probably because I was inclined to feel this as well, was, was awesome. Like, really awesome.

[00:13:30.190] - Oliver (Host)

Where were you in the country?

[00:13:31.720] - Antonio (Guest)

I was in Lille. And this is important, this is something important to say, because they have this reputation for being very, um, welcoming, very open-minded as well, very nice people. And outgoing. So I felt that as soon as I arrived. And yeah, I had a great experience. I had this person I met one day that made me meet the rest of the friends as well, which was very nice. So I felt really immersed in the culture from day one. Compared to what I felt in England. And I'm not saying this like in a bad way, of course. But yeah, it was very different. The circumstances were different.

[00:14:27.880] - Oliver (Host)

So, well, maybe we can reframe this not as a France is better than the UK, but instead Lille is better than Portsmouth, which is

[00:14:35.570] - Antonio (Guest)

Not better, it's not better than the UK.

[00:14:38.760] - Oliver (Host)

Different, different from—

[00:14:40.060] - Antonio (Guest)

It's different from the UK.

[00:14:42.610] - Oliver (Host)

Well, actually, you know, the whole kind of like my whole saga with France on the podcast really began when we went to— César and I, my usual partner on the podcast, we are learning French, as you know. And we went to Montpellier for a couple of weeks last summer and did a language course. And we did an episode there, a couple of episodes basically about how nice Montpellier was and what a great time we were having. And, you know, I was surprised. But not being that surprised because we'd gone to Toulouse the year before and had a similarly good time. So I did an episode of the intermediate level of this podcast about, um, French-British cooperation on things like Concorde, uh, the Channel Tunnel, uh, a variety— the fact that the UK and France almost became one country, uh, at two different points in the 20th century, uh, that there were proposals to unite them as one one country.

[00:15:40.160] - Antonio (Guest)

That would have been very funny to see.

[00:15:42.560] - Oliver (Host)

Yeah, exactly. Well, I'm sure that the country would not still exist. But it was— but we, in doing this episode, we had some French listeners reach out and basically say, I promise you, France is really nice. And I had specifically said that I'd always had a bad time in Paris, which is true. But I accepted that the rest of the country was lovely. So César and I, encouraged by one of these listeners, went to Paris last November. And I have to say, it was from beginning to end absolutely perfect. You know, as soon as we stepped outside of the airport into, you know, the arrivals lounge, there was a big poster saying, Paris loves you in French. And I was like, we'll see. But Everybody, everybody, the whole way through the trip, there was not a single kind of like stereotypical Parisian interaction. Everybody was so lovely. We spoke French the whole time and never once did anyone switch to English, which is the joke that we always have. Everyone was really lovely from beginning to end. So I have to say, I might be a bit of a convert now with France as well. We're gonna— we're hopefully gonna go back again, so, this summer.

[00:17:02.470] - Antonio (Guest)

It's a good country. And yeah, Parisians may be different, you know, but on the other side, one of my best, best friends is Parisian. So you never know what to expect from people.

[00:17:17.910] - Oliver (Host)

So you think that some of your best friends are? Well, yeah, exactly. I mean, I think that obviously you have to take everything on an individual basis, but I have to say it was really, really good. Before you go, I have one more question, which is about the fact that you're also learning Greek now. (I am.) So do you foresee the possibility of living, you know, having a spell, spending a little bit of time in Greece?

[00:17:43.590] - Antonio (Guest)

You know what, after my year in Italy, that was the last experience I had abroad, living abroad as a fully functional adult. Which to me makes a big difference compared to being students or something like that. I concluded that I was done with living abroad, you know, even though I love to have that experience, you know, to live in Greece and to speak the language. But I think I won't do this. I wouldn't do that. Again. You never know, like, never say never, of course. But yeah, I am enjoying a lot the process of learning such a different language to what I was used to. Of course, I know you learn Arabic, which is even further and harder, but yeah, to me, Greek is a fascinating language, and it's been very interesting. Also, it gives me a lot of perspective and helps me help my students even more, which is— I like to be a permanent, a constant learner and student, and Greek is proving to be a good challenge for me, honestly.

[00:19:10.220] - Oliver (Host)

Yeah. Well, no, I totally understand where you're coming from, especially from the perspective of reminding yourself what it is to learn a language. Learning Arabic has been a humbling experience, to say the least.

[00:19:20.810] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, humbling is the word. You think you may make yourself understand (understood) in Roman languages, you know, or something close to English, but then you come across certain languages and then you realise, no, it's not possible.

[00:19:36.880] - Oliver (Host)

No, exactly. But I can say truly that I am genuinely really enjoying the experience, and it sounds like you are in Greek as well. Even if a year in Athens is not in your future, having just moved internationally, I think you're probably right that it's probably not the— it's a tiresome experience, to say the least.

[00:19:59.480] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, it's not always easy. So I love many aspects of having a digital nomad or expat experience, but on the other side, it's not easy, and especially if you've got you know, a partner, family. I'm done with it for now, I think.

[00:20:24.780] - Oliver (Host)

Okay, well, thank you very much, Antonio, for speaking to us, speaking to me here on the podcast. I really appreciate it, and hopefully there'll be many more episodes in the future.

[00:20:36.000] - Antonio (Guest)

Yeah, I hope so. I hope so. Thanks a lot for having me here.

[00:20:41.240] - Oliver (Host)

Okay, see you soon. And thank you very much, listener, also for listening. And we will see you next time. Bye-bye. Bye.