A Horror Story: Learning a Language as an Adult
- English and Beyond

- Oct 29
- 7 min read
Updated: Oct 31
Flashcards: Available here
[00:00:00.000] - Oliver (Host)
Remember your first day at school? You had your new pencil case, your clean notebook, that nervous little smile, and that strange mix of excitement and fear that you might sit in the wrong chair or end up in the wrong classroom and embarrass yourself in front of everyone. Well, I remember that feeling very well because I had it again a few weeks ago at the tender and vulnerable age of 36 years old. Except this time, it wasn't primary school. It was Arabic class here in Valencia, Spain. So in this week's episode, I want to talk about what it's like to go back to the classroom to study a language like English as an adult, and I'll share some of the things I've learned so far along the way. Welcome back to English and Beyond: Intermediate English Podcast. My name is Oliver. I'm an English, Latin, and Spanish teacher from the United Kingdom. As always, you can find the free transcript and vocabulary flashcards at morethanalanguage.com. If you find these resources or even just the podcast itself useful or interesting or entertaining or anything at all, please consider subscribing or leaving me a few stars on your podcast listening app.
[00:01:28.900] - Oliver (Host)
It makes a huge to the growth of the podcast. Now, I've studied languages for most of my life, Latin from the age of 10, followed by various experiences living abroad and trying to pick up the local language. But nearly every language I've studied has shared at least something with that first one, Latin. Grammar, vocabulary, an alphabet, some logic that feels familiar. But Arabic? Arabic feels like a different world entirely from a linguistic point of view. I've spent almost a month in class so far, and I still write like a three-year-old using the wrong hand while riding a roller coaster. My letters themselves look nervous, as if they don't even want to be on the page. When the teacher walks around the room checking our work, I find myself wanting to cover mine with my arm like a teenager hiding bad exam answers. And that actually brings me back to the first point of the episode. I was surprised by just how humbling it is to return to a formal classroom setting, by just how much it hurts my ego. I know that many of you listening are doing the same thing in your 30s and beyond, sitting in English classes, maybe after years away from studying, surrounded by people you've never met, all with different accents, backgrounds, and levels.
[00:03:04.680] - Oliver (Host)
So you'll understand that strange mix of potential pride and potential panic when the teacher asks you to speak and your brain just forget gets every word you've ever learned. It's been truly bizarre to me to realise that the moment you're a student again, all those same feelings come back. Nervousness, self-consciousness, the desperate hope that the teacher won't ask you the next question. In our last class, our last lesson, after a few weeks of practising, writing, and listening skills, the teacher decided it was time for a fun little social exercise to consolidate our new skills, to strengthen our new abilities. Nothing dramatic, just going around the classroom one by one, introducing ourselves to the person next to us. Arabic has specific greeting patterns, with one person using one introduction and the other person responding with a slight variation. It was really easy, and I sit near the back, so I got to watch like 15 people do it. Except, of course, it wasn't easy at all in the end, I'm very embarrassed to admit. Because once you know your turn is about to arrive, something strange happens to your brain. I literally had been sitting there, relaxed at my desk, totally confident of what I was going to say.
[00:04:37.720] - Oliver (Host)
And then, I stopped even being able to hear the words from the other students, and I was suddenly frantically rehearsing the same two sentences again and again under my breath. My neighbour turned to me, calm, confident, smiling, introducing himself, and my brain decided to take a short holiday. Every I had learned, vanished. What came out of my mouth wasn't Arabic or English, Spanish, or really any known language. Everyone was very kind, of course, but I could see the teacher's face, that expression that says, Well, top marks for effort. It's amazing, isn't it? How even the simplest task, introducing yourself, can turn into a full psychological event once nerves get involved. Or is that just me? What really surprised me was how quickly that feeling of panic took over and how familiar it was. You can be a perfectly functioning adult with a job and responsibilities, even a mortgage, and still turn into a nervous child the moment a teacher looks in your direction. And it's funny, it's ironic, because I've actually been a teacher myself. I stood at the front of the classroom and said this exact same thing to my students. Don't worry, everyone's nervous.
[00:06:04.800] - Oliver (Host)
It's completely normal. No one is judging you. But when it's your turn, when you're the one in the spotlight and answering the questions, it feels very much like everyone is judging you. So why am I putting myself through all this embarrassment? Well, I started these lessons partially for the same reason that many of you are learning English, to travel. My sister in Saudi Arabia, and I wanted to be able to visit her and more countries in the Arabic-speaking world. What's more, I wanted to share the experience of learning the language together with my sister. She finds the whole idea of studying languages a bit intimidating, whereas I've always loved it. So we thought it would be a good way to support each other, learning Arabic together, even if we are doing it from different countries. And I know that for many of you, it's the same. You're not studying English because you have to pass an exam. You're learning because you want to travel, to connect with people, to understand the world differently, to broaden work opportunities, or simply because you enjoy the challenge. And that last one is really common with people learning foreign languages after the age of 40.
[00:07:27.040] - Oliver (Host)
But all this is what makes adult learners so interesting. We all have a story, a reason, behind why we're doing it. And it's not because it's a requirement of our secondary school education. Of course, studying as an adult feels very different from studying as a child. When you're younger, frankly, you're often not really aware of how much you don't know. You just turn up and you're put to work, forced to learn, often against your will. But as an adult, you notice every mistake. You've chosen to be there, so you're more likely to expect to understand everything straight away. And when you don't, you're more likely to think there's something wrong with you, that it's too hard, that you're too old. I've realised that a big part of learning a language later in life isn't about memory or grammar. It's about letting go of that desire, that need to be perfect. You don't have to be the best student in the room. You just have to keep showing up, doing the work, and being consistent. And no matter how bad your pronunciation in English is right now, it's definitely going to be better than mine in Arabic.
[00:08:46.440] - Oliver (Host)
The good news, though, is that the classroom has changed. We don't just have textbooks and physical dictionaries anymore. We have more advanced technology, and it can actually make studying languages much easier. For example, I often take a photo of a vocabulary list or a page from my Arabic textbook and ask ChatGPT to turn it into digital flashcards. You can then use apps like Anki, Quizlet, or Brainscape to test yourself wherever you are. AI can also be used to extend vocabulary in a similar way. If you already know all the words from a given worksheet, for example, you can ask AI to help you go above and beyond to you learn new related vocabulary. Or if you're learning English and you're not sure about pronunciation, because obviously that is a big issue with this language, you can also use the Google Translate app. Type in a word or a sentence, press the speaker icon and listen to how it sounds. You can repeat it, compare your pronunciation, and practise as many times as you want. In this case, literally no one is judging you, unless Google that has started to listen in that closely. You can even ask AI to create extra sentences with the new words you're studying in class, so you can see them in different contexts or practise translating them from your native language into English.
[00:10:15.300] - Oliver (Host)
I have to say, AI isn't perfect, and it will make mistakes, of course, but for language learners, it's good enough, and sometimes, that's all you need. Studying a new language again has reminded me how it feels to be a complete beginner, to make the same mistakes again and again and again, and to feel, frankly, like an absolute moron, like an idiot. And I think that's actually quite healthy. Feeling out of our depth, feeling like a bit of a fool, keeps us curious, hardworking, patient, and perhaps, most importantly, humble. And if you're learning English right now and you feel sometimes stuck or embarrassed, perhaps it will help you to remember that I'm somewhere in Valencia trying to write the Arabic alphabet and still making it look like some sort of medical emergency. The point when learning English, when learning any language, isn't to be perfect. It's to keep going. Thank you for listening, and I will see you next time.



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